One of the worst problems we could ever have as human beings is having a lack of self-worth.

Self-esteem is the opinion you have about yourself. If you tend to think nice things about yourself you will be happier. If you think aggressive things about yourself you will be miserable.  

People who think negative things about themselves become their worst enemy. They will not only look for ways to subconsciously punish themselves but will also will let others abuse them one way or the other. What you think about yourself has nothing to do with who you are or what you've achieved in life. It has to do with your tolerance level and with how often you are usually comparing yourself with others. It's a matter of opinions, not facts.

Do you know that we are all wearing uniforms? Some uniforms can be pretty obvious, like the uniform a police officer or a doctor wear. Other uniforms can be quite subtle, so subtle that you may not even know what uniform you are wearing.

The uniform we wear tells others not only which clothes you chose that day but also how you feel about yourself.

People feel emotions when they see us. It takes people approximately 5 seconds to realize what we have inside our heads and how we feel about ourselves.

What emotions do we get when we see a guy with torn clothes, dirty face, and reeking of alcohol following us at night? What feelings do we get when you see a nicely dressed man or woman walking with confidence near you? What emotion do you get when you see a guy with his hands in his pockets, hunching down and avoiding eye contact?

And I am not talking about clothing here, I´m talking about behavior, how we walk, how we talk, how we move, our facial expression, our voice pitch, etc.

If you read the article I wrote about the cute little nose let me ask you
What was my uniform before my nose surgery?
What was my uniform after?

My uniform changed a lot, my nose didn't. Isn't that ironic?

What uniform are you wearing?

There is this movie that I like a lot, it is about uniforms as well, when you get a chance, rent it and watch it. Its name is The Mirror Has Two Faces. In this movie there are two sisters: Rose the ugly one and Claire the pretty one.  Rose, whose character is played by Barbra Streisand, is unable to date any guy. She has a crush on Pierce Brosnan but he´s obviously interested in Claire.

Finally she marries a man who doesn't treat her right, but since she believes she´s ugly she doesn't expect much from her relationship with him anyway.

One day she´s having a conversation with her mom, she tells her mom how awful life is for an ugly woman and how much better life would be if she were as pretty as her sister Claire.

-Even when we were little mom (and in the meantime she grabs a picture frame with a girl in it)
-look at how pretty my sister was as a girl, look at her rosy cheeks and her pretty lips, look at those beautiful eyes. And look at that ugly girl right there mom, I don´t even know why you have that picture of me sitting on that table.

Suddenly her mom starts laughing.
-You are so silly! The pretty girl with the rosy cheeks and pretty lips is you. The one you describe as ugly is your sister.  You were indeed such a pretty child.

Then something happens in Barbra´s mind, she gets surprised,  she starts feeling pretty and worthy, she realizes she has to be treated differently, and as a result, everything around her changes. She leaves her husband, she dresses differently, many guys start finding her attractive, and the only thing that changed was her opinion about herself.  She didn't even need a nose job!

She took off the ugly woman uniform and she put on the beautiful woman uniform. I want to ask you again: What uniform are you wearing? Is it an opinion? Is it a fact?

Is the uniform that you are wearing the uniform you want to wear?

When you change your perception about yourself, everything around you will change as a result.

No one will ever see something in you that you haven't seen beforehand. You have to feel worthy so others start looking at you that way. Not only that, nobody will treat you in a different way than how you treat yourself.

This is how the mind works:
If I don´t love myself I don´t deserve anything good
If I don´t deserve anything good…  good things will not happen to me

People with low self-esteem have the tendency to have abusive and ungrateful children, along with abusive and rude friends. They will always run into rude waiters at restaurants, they will have an evil mother-in-law, etc. People with low self-esteem tend to become victims in their relationships because they will put up with things other people wouldn't tolerate.

People with low self-esteem will never go after their dreams because those are too good to be true and, since they are not important people, they do not deserve the happiness of fulfilling their dreams.

I'm sure you remember the story I told you about the awful cookies that I baked. These cookies had very little flour and great amounts of shortening, therefore I ended up with a bunch of awful tasting cookies, and to make matters worse, I ate them all to punish myself and I made myself sick.

My recipe was wrong, the result was wrong, and therefore I punished myself because I related the recipe with my self-worth. Wrong recipes in life generate wrong results, and wrong results are closely attached to our self-esteem, IF WE ALLOW THAT TO HAPPEN. A mistake doesn't make you a failure. Thinking that you are a failure will make you believe you are one.

Decide you are worthy, decide you deserve good things. Make positive affirmations over and over. A great life is ahead of you. It is OK to be down, it is OK to have bad moments sometimes. What it is not OK is to thrash yourself with verbal or mental abuse.